Do you struggle with Anxiety? 

There's a common misconception that anxiety is something that happens to us. It feels that way. The good news is anxiety is like any other emotion and it is caused by our thoughts. And our thoughts are always optional. 

But, the emotional response in our body might need a different exercise to process the emotion, so it stops coming up. It might not stop completely, but it will come less often and when it comes you'll know exactly how to handle it.

It was interesting how the definition for anxiety was similar to the definition of stress. In fact, they both start with "our body's natural response". This is what give us the feeling of the emotion happening to us. And they are both in response to a perceived threat or danger. This means there really isn't a threat or danger, our brain just thinks there is. 

We can also understand why we even have anxiety and find gratitude in the fact that it's a survival mechanism that has allowed the human race to evolve to the world we live in today. We can also normalize the feeling, because it's a normal and natural emotional experience. This means that nothing has gone wrong and there's nothing wrong with us. 

However, the feeling of anxiety usually isn't the problem. Nor is it really what we are experiencing. What we experience is our reaction to it. We avoid it, resist it, or fight it.

The feeling of anxiety is simply a vibration in our body, if we just allow it to be there. It won't harm us, it won't kill us. But our brain would have us believe otherwise. Why is that? It's our survival mechanism. 

When we understand this is our body's natural response, we can allow ourselves to stop avoiding or resisting it. 

If we just allow the emotion to happen, we can regain control over it.

Here is a step by step process to help you navigate anxiety. 

Step 1 is to recognize when anxiety is happening. Acknowledge, become aware of it. 

Then we want to actively accept it and own it. Quietly witness it and observe it. When you intentionally allow it, you're in control over it. You're letting it be there. Tell yourself that it's okay. I feel anxious and it's okay. There's a buzz in my body and I'm okay. It's uncomfortable, but we can tolerate it.

Remember our thoughts create our emotions, so let's do a thought download and explore the thinking behind our emotions. You want to just dump everything out that's in your mind, like dumping out the junk drawer. No judgement or filters, just let it all out onto the paper. You might immediately understand why you're feeling anxious based on the thoughts you discover. Some may be irrational, most might be irrational. 

Now describe how anxiety feels in your body. Where do you feel it? What does it feel like? Get specific. This is part of the allowing. You can add in some deep breaths and just allow the feeling in your body. Tell yourself it's okay. You can sit and stay with the emotion in your body. You're safe, you're not in danger. 

You'll know how long to do this work, because you'll feel the shift. You'll feel lighter, you'll feel better. 

I'd recommend deciding that you're going to do this exercise the next time you feel anxiety. You can also decide that you'll create anxiety on purpose and then perform the exercise. This proves to you that you are in control of the emotion. Your thoughts cause it and you can increase it and decrease it. Always in control. 

Plan to allow for enough time to do all the steps. You won't need hours. If you're doing the thought download as part of it, that will take a little longer. The process of allowing is not a long drawn out process. You'll know when it's complete, because you'll feel it. It will be different for everyone. 

If you want to re-watch the Tuesday Talks about Irrational Thoughts, you can find that one linked here: 

Irrational Thoughts

If you have any questions as you go through this work, just let me know. 

I know many of us do not want to feel negative emotion. But life is 50/50, we cannot have the feeling of happy without the feeling of sad. We wouldn't know the difference if there wasn't the contrast. Feeling negative emotion is part of the human experience. When you can accept that as a part of life, it can feel like relief. You're not doing life wrong. This is the experience of life. 

You can experience life as just existing. Or you can create an extraordinary experience. It's up to you! 

If I can help in any way, just let me know!